Monday, March 2, 2015


Do you know who YOU are? Silly question, I know. But take a moment and think about it. If someone asked, "What do you stand for? What defines you? What makes up who you are? What do you want out of life? What makes you smile? What makes your heart beat?" Would you be able to answer that?! Or would you have to think about it long and hard?

Up until a week ago my life was moving right along. I had routine. I assumed where I was, is where I would always be. And I settled for that. But then...

I stood in front of the mirror and my reflection was not who I wanted to be. I'm not talking the physical appearance. I'm talking about looking at myself and asking questions. The tough questions. The questions no one ever wants to ask because we all just keep our eyes straight ahead and never look around. We love being comfortable. We love knowing that tomorrow everything will be exactly how we left it. But something happened when I started to think more and more bout my life...

I have always known what I want and who I was. I knew what I had to offer as a wife, a mom, and as a friend. I have always been so sure of my life. Every detail. Every decision that has been made. Every word that has come out of my mouth. I never think twice. I just go for it. But standing back and evaluating myself, something clicked.

I realized that I want to be so happy my heart wants to explode. I want to smile all the time and have my face hurt. I want to love myself more then I have been. I want to look deep with in and know I am who I want to be. Not because I have to be but because I choose to be. I want to focus on myself more. I need that. I need to take care of ME. YES, YES, YES, I have two kids, but that's a whole different post for another day. This post is about soul searching. Reflecting on life. Reflecting on who we are, and what we want out of this life. We only live once. We only have one chance. Life is too short to be pressured into situations we aren't ready for. Life is too short not to love and live 100%. I choose to be happy. I choose to love myself with out questioning it. I choose to make decisions for my kids and myself. Not for pleasing others. Not because I am afraid of what everyone will think or how people will judge. I think its time to take a few steps back in life, and ask the tough questions we all avoid.

And so it begins...

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