Monday, March 2, 2015


Do you know who YOU are? Silly question, I know. But take a moment and think about it. If someone asked, "What do you stand for? What defines you? What makes up who you are? What do you want out of life? What makes you smile? What makes your heart beat?" Would you be able to answer that?! Or would you have to think about it long and hard?

Up until a week ago my life was moving right along. I had routine. I assumed where I was, is where I would always be. And I settled for that. But then...

I stood in front of the mirror and my reflection was not who I wanted to be. I'm not talking the physical appearance. I'm talking about looking at myself and asking questions. The tough questions. The questions no one ever wants to ask because we all just keep our eyes straight ahead and never look around. We love being comfortable. We love knowing that tomorrow everything will be exactly how we left it. But something happened when I started to think more and more bout my life...

I have always known what I want and who I was. I knew what I had to offer as a wife, a mom, and as a friend. I have always been so sure of my life. Every detail. Every decision that has been made. Every word that has come out of my mouth. I never think twice. I just go for it. But standing back and evaluating myself, something clicked.

I realized that I want to be so happy my heart wants to explode. I want to smile all the time and have my face hurt. I want to love myself more then I have been. I want to look deep with in and know I am who I want to be. Not because I have to be but because I choose to be. I want to focus on myself more. I need that. I need to take care of ME. YES, YES, YES, I have two kids, but that's a whole different post for another day. This post is about soul searching. Reflecting on life. Reflecting on who we are, and what we want out of this life. We only live once. We only have one chance. Life is too short to be pressured into situations we aren't ready for. Life is too short not to love and live 100%. I choose to be happy. I choose to love myself with out questioning it. I choose to make decisions for my kids and myself. Not for pleasing others. Not because I am afraid of what everyone will think or how people will judge. I think its time to take a few steps back in life, and ask the tough questions we all avoid.

And so it begins...

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

A Slice of Happiness

I am all about being happy!!! I love to smile! I love to laugh! Although I will admit, half the time I'm  laughing is because I think I am soooo funny! HAHA!! Smiling, laughing and finding the bright side in everything is the way to live. ALL the time!

There are very few things AND people that bring me "true" happiness. Let me be more specific!!!!

Singing in my car brings me smiles. Making jokes at work makes me laugh. Watching the garbage guy miss my trash can is absolutely hilarious. Peeking out the window and seeing the mail man come to the mail box, knowing I haven't checked it in three weeks, and seeing the frustration on their face makes me smile...and possibly evil! But hey, I pay all my bills by the internet, so who needs paper mail anyways?! DON'T JUDGE! I smile when I see the ladies dog down the street crap on my "oh so nice" neighbors grass. In my head I know she deserves it, and my face shows it with a BIG OL' SMILE. Just keeping it real peeps!!! But this entry isn't about that superficial happiness, its about the things that make your heart go..."BOOM!"

True happiness is watching your kids succeed at something they have struggled at. True happiness is sitting still while the whole world goes round. It's holding a new born baby, it's seeing a rainbow, it's feeling content even though life is crazy. It's listening to your favorite song and having memories flood back. It's remembering special moments with special people. It's dancing in the rain and kissing. Happiness is when your heart skips a beat, your mind feels at ease and your whole world freezes...AND at that very moment you can not imagine yourself anywhere else but where you are. Holding the person you love is complete happiness. Easing some one's pain is considered true happiness.When you see someone smile, because of YOU, is true happiness.

My dear friends, when you find those specific things that make your heart go "boom," do me the favor and never ever let them go. Hang on to those moments, memories, or people. Don't let go of what makes your heart content. Even if you question it!!!! If you feel it, then live it. BE YOU! Always be true!! Happiness is hard to find and harder to hang onto......DON'T EVER LET IT GO. No matter what the cost. No matter what it takes. Those moments are priceless...


Wednesday, January 21, 2015


 You ever expect some one to act or say a certain thing, and when they don't, your thinking, "What the hell man?" I do it all the time. I expect random people AND my very own friends to act how I want them....well guess what?? Jokes on me.


I think one of the hugest problems we run into is "expectations!" Now, don't get me wrong, when it comes to certain people or certain situations, expectations are a necessity. Let me write it AGAIN!!! When it comes to certain people, you can have certain expectations. Let me give you an example so you can catch your breath!!! You expect your children to listen the first time they are told. You expect the garbage man to come every week to pick up your trash! You expect your parents to be there when you need them. You expect your dog to crap in your backyard, or in some cases, you expect the neighbors dog to shit on your lawn. Whatever!! We expect our best friend to bail us out of jail, although I don't plan on going anytime soon. These are all expectations that don't need to be said out loud. Many times we put expectations on certain people, expecting them to act a certain way. We expect them to say what we think they should say. When they don't, our blood boils. We feel let down! Pissed! Annoyed! We almost feel hurt!!! In our own minds, we know what WE would say. We know how WE would act. But just because we feel that way, doesn't mean they do. All too often we set ourselves up to be let down. We think we know what people should say or how they should act, but guess what?!?! We don't have the right to get mad when someone doesn't respond how we want them to. We don't have the right to get annoyed when someone doesn't "act" how we think they should or expect them too. Especially if they are our friends.  We need to accept them for who they are. How they feel. What they say and how they act. STOP trying to "expect" this or that, and just let them be....THEM. Including our significant others. Which sometimes sucks! I know that when I expect my husband to say or do something and he doesn't..... I want to snap his neck!! ( Kidding....sorta)

I have been hurt so many times by expecting this or that from certain people, and when they didn't come through or do what I thought they should, it through  my emotions into a whirl wind and I lost it. When I stand back, I actually giggle, because I do it to myself!!  EVERY time. It's my own damn fault. The minute I stopped "expecting," is the minute I enjoyed people for who they were, regardless if they didn't do what I thought they should. To be completely honest, I still get frustrated at times and I catch myself being ridiculous!!!!!

You can agree or disagree, but really take a moment to step back and think. How many times did you expect something from someone and it didn't go the way you saw it going and it frustrated you?!?! Is it really their fault that you held them SO high?? You expected a certain reaction from them and they didn't do what you wanted. Is that really THEIR fault?? Reality check......Its not all about YOU!!!! And trust me, its not all about THEM!!!! But....


Saturday, January 10, 2015


Ahhhhhhh snap!!! What a crazy, emotional, weird, sucky week this was. I'm serious when I say be careful what you wish for, (or say) cause most likely it's gonna happen and when it does you better have your big girl panties on and your boxing gloves up.

We discussed my motto for 2015 in my last entry. We also discussed keep'n it real and true no matter what. And I mean, NO MATTER WHAT!! Well,  I'll be damned if I wasn't tested this whole week. I swear from the moment I clicked submit on my last write, shit started to hit the fan. I won't go into details, it's not worth re-thinking about all of that, but the hurtles I had to jump this week were insane. I am  used to ones that don't take much effort on my part. It comes easy for me to run and jump. Clearing it all and moving forward. Not this week. For some reason these hurtles were much larger. Maybe they only appeared larger because of my new motto and attitude. You can't preach something then act a different way. So, I had to stick to my guns. I had to keep it real in more ways then one. Maybe sugar coating it, is easier and less "in your face" but being completely honest and real with yourself and others is serious business. No matter how the other person reacts or how the situation turns out, as long as you are YOU that's all that matters. As much as I would love to control others and their attitudes, its obviously impossible! Next best thing is to control your attitude.It's tough. And sometimes sucks! As sure as I am of myself when specific things happen I become shaken in my own skin. How is that possible? I know ME. I know what I am capable of. I know that I can carry the world on my shoulders, so why was this week so different? Damn my new motto and my new attitude. I say all of this with a huge smile on my face because I know this is just the beginning to what is going to be an awesome year.

Continue to be YOU! Be TRUE! And sugar coat NOTHING!

Monday, January 5, 2015

Choose Wisely

Its been ages since I have written anything. I do in fact, love to write, but finding the time to do so is crazy impossible. I decided its a new year, and I want to write on a regular basis. I seem to always say that exact thing but this time I am really going to TRY.

Before I even start, let me throw this out there. If you cant handle a bit of dirt and grime, or if the cold honest truth makes you quiver please don't read any further. I am all about honesty, and I am all about telling things exactly how they are. I dont want to be judged by what I write. You may agree or disagree and thats ok. My spelling may be off, and I may even type a bad word here or there, so if you cant handle the above, you may reconsider reading this blog. That was my disclaimer, and if your still with me, then lets continue.

I decided my new motto for 2015 is "You get, what you give." I am not sugar coating anything for anyone. And I know, you probably think I am an awful person, but now a days people tend to candy coat shit to make it more "real." People tend to expect the world from you, but wont throw you a bone if you were starving. Well guess what, you scratch my back and I will for sure scratch yours. You throw me off the ledge, you better believe your going down with me. I love people. I love my friends. I love my family. But sometimes you just need to take a few steps back and make sure your living your life for YOU and not a single other person. In fact, I would do anything for my friends. I have very few of them, but the ones I do have I hold close to my heart.

I enjoyed 2014 big time. My family was blessed in so many different ways. I learned more about myself then I ever have. I have done things I would never tell a soul, well maybe one soul but thats it! I have made friends and lost friends. Those who chose to leave, I held the door wide open for. See, I am a nice person. Sometimes we think we cant possibly learn anything else about ourselves, and then boom! We do. A situation arises that puts us to the test and what ever choice we make will define who we are,and who we are becoming. I hope I never fully reach my potential. I hope I continue to grow and learn about myself every day. I love who I am becoming. My foundation is pretty much set in stone, but the bricks I lay from here on out will be bricks only I set down.

I will say it feels good to be back!!! If you have survived this first post, then maybe, just maybe you will be back for some more good ol'  Tastie Truth. Remember, around these parts, I keep things real. Hold on tight, its gonna be a bumpy ride.